Tag Archives: sexual initiation

Why am I always the one who has to initiate sex?

This past week, we were having a discussion in our Uncovering Intimacy Champions group.  I won’t post the full start of the conversation because I haven’t asked if I could, but the gist of it was this:  How do you keep initiating sex when your spouse,

How do I open up to my spouse sexually?

How do I open up to my spouse sexually?

Here’s a question that’s very important to me, because it’s one that is beginning of something wonderful in a marriage.  I’ve gotten it so many times over the years that I wrote an entire course around it. How do I open up to my spouse

Why lower-drive spouses should initiate sex

One of the largest, and yet least talked about, struggles in marriage is the difference in sex drives.  Often one spouse ends up doing the bulk of the initiating and pushing for a more varied and passionate sex life.  Often, this ends up with a

Being more skilled at rejection

Being more skilled at rejection

A couple of posts ago, I wrote about being more skilled at initiating sex, but today we’re going to tackle rejection.  I think sexual rejection might be one of the touchiest conflicts to handle in marriage.  It’s hard to do correctly and too easily to

Are you the gatekeeper of sex?

Are you the gatekeeper of sex?

It often happens that one spouse becomes the gatekeeper of sex in a marriage. I think a lot of the time, they don’t even realize they are.  Sometimes it’s because they’re selfish.  Sometimes it’s because they have misunderstandings about sex.  Sometimes it’s because they have

Your spouse may need time to want sex

Your spouse may need time to desire sex

Something that’s often hard for those of us who are interested in sex more often to understand why our spouses don’t want sex as often.  While working through my questions backlog, I saw this one, and wanted to answer it: What does it mean for

I don’t think my spouse is attracted to me

I received this question through our Have A Question page yesterday: Why do I feel that my wife doesn’t find me attractive or desirable? For the past couple of years, I have been feeling like my wife doesn’t find me attractive anymore. She hardly ever

Dealing with passive rejection

I received this question yesterday through our anonymous Have A Question page: When ever I ask my wife for sex she doesn’t say no but she just says she has to do a few things out side and then she will be right back but

Confidence is sexy

I caused a bit of a stir yesterday with my post Romance is the death of sexual attraction.  This is sort of a part two, but not the part two I think a lot of people were expecting.  In short, if you don’t want to

Discussion about initiating sex

We’re going to try something a bit different today, we’re going to try a discussion question.  Basically, I’m not going to write a post, I’m just going to ask a couple of questions and open the floor to comments below. Because sometimes I get questions