For the last month or so, we’ve had a survey open about how you prefer to have your spouse initiate sex. If you never got a chance, you can fill it out here. I do sometimes delve into old surveys…
What’s the best way to initiate sex?
Initiating
SWM 047 – Spontaneous desire is a blessing
Ever feel like having a high sex drive is a burden? Have you wondered why God made you this way? Here are some of the reasons I think having spontaneous desire is a blessing.
SWM 046 – Responsive desire is a blessing
Responsive desire isn’t an abnormality, disability or curse. It’s a blessing. Once you learn to work with it, it can actually lead to an amazing sex life.
Are you sabotaging your sex life like I do?
I’ve spent the last few years trying to get better insight into the mind of a spouse who desires less sex. Why? Because I’m married to one, and one of my goals in life is to make her feel known…
Trapped gatekeepers – blame the guard, not the prisoner
In some marriages, the spouse with the lower sex drive simply decides their perspective is the most important and ends up being the gatekeeper of sex. That is, they decide when sex is, what sort of sex there is, and…
Why is initiating sex so difficult?
If you’re married, you likely have some difficulty initiating sex. Whether you’re a husband or wife, high drive or low drive, we have all have potential obstacles that can hold us back from showing our spouse we want to…
If initiating sex is uncomfortable, start with initiating precursors
A lot of spouses are not comfortable initiating sex. It might be that you have a fear of rejection, or that your upbringing makes you uncomfortable being sexual, or any other reason. In our Becoming more sexually engaged course, we…
Why lower-drive spouses should initiate sex
One of the largest, and yet least talked about, struggles in marriage is the difference in sex drives. Often one spouse ends up doing the bulk of the initiating and pushing for a more varied and passionate sex life. Often,…
Being more skilled at rejection
A couple of posts ago, I wrote about being more skilled at initiating sex, but today we’re going to tackle rejection. I think sexual rejection might be one of the touchiest conflicts to handle in marriage. It’s hard to do…
Being more skilled at initiation
I think one of the biggest conflicts regarding sex with a lot of couples is simply how initiation and rejection are handled. From both sides. I think if we could improve that one back and forth conversation, a lot of…
How to ask for what you want in bed
I think a lot of spouses don’t ask for what they want in bed. I think this is frustrating for both spouses because the spouse who doesn’t ask if often not getting what they want or need to make the sexual…