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Initiating


Dealing with passive rejection

I received this question yesterday through our anonymous Have A Question page: When ever I ask my wife for sex she doesn’t say no but she just says she has to do a few things out side and then she…

Confidence is sexy

I caused a bit of a stir yesterday with my post Romance is the death of sexual attraction.  This is sort of a part two, but not the part two I think a lot of people were expecting.  In short,…

You cannot make a refuser generous

I get a lot of husbands and wives asking me how to change their spouse.  How do you make them go from a refuser to a generous spouse?  After all, I managed it, so what’s the trick?  The truth is,…

Discussion about initiating sex

We’re going to try something a bit different today, we’re going to try a discussion question.  Basically, I’m not going to write a post, I’m just going to ask a couple of questions and open the floor to comments below.…

Initiation only counts if your spouse recognizes it

My wife and I were talking about people’s responses to yesterday’s post.  Our conversation let to what initiation was.  We had just had sex, and I mentioned that I had initiated that encounter.  Initially she disagreed saying “I came to…

Be Authentic about your Sexual Desire

I get a lot of emails from spouses.  I get to read about a lot of marriages in those emails.  I get to read about how spouses react, how they think, their struggles, their concerns, their hopes, their fears.  One…

Is gatekeeping dishonouring God?

I received this question from our anonymous Have A Question page about a week ago: My husband and I have been married for 4 years. For the past 3, I’ve not wanted to have as much sex as him. Is…

Is feeling disrespected an excuse to refuse sex?

Sometimes I get questions on our Have a Question page and I have to guess at what’s being asked, since I don’t have any contact info to follow up with. Here’s a message I received yesterday: my taking no interest…