Category Archives: Sex Drive


Can married sex be erotic?

Can married sex be erotic?

Yesterday I wrote that one of the myths we buy into is that sex has to be erotic all the time.  I think it’s true that sex won’t be erotic every time. Sometimes, like with “maintenance sex” as I called it, sex isn’t that …

3 myths that kill maintenance sex

3 myths that kill maintenance sex

I fully believe that married sex should be erotic, frequent, adventurous and a host of other things.  However, sometimes there’s just not enough time for all of those things. Life can get busy and occasionally you just have to have sex, because that’s what the

Are you the gatekeeper of sex?

Are you the gatekeeper of sex?

It often happens that one spouse becomes the gatekeeper of sex in a marriage. I think a lot of the time, they don’t even realize they are.  Sometimes it’s because they’re selfish.  Sometimes it’s because they have misunderstandings about sex.  Sometimes it’s because they have

Do you have time to explore?

Do you have time to explore?

We’re having a rough time lately with regard to bed times. Our youngest just doesn’t want to sleep when we want to sleep when we want to sleep.  He’ll pass out on the floor at supper time, which is a terrible time for a nap

Do you feel like a sexual being, or a sexual object?

Do you feel like a sexual object or a sexual being?

I’m trying to process something I was thinking about on my commute home today.  It has to do with this verse: The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not

Having kids does not mean a healthy sex life

Sometimes we make assumptions about the couples around us.  Sometimes they make assumptions about us. I remember when were still in our sexless phase, we managed to have two kids.  We seem to be a very fertile couple.  Now, don’t get me wrong, that’s a

Is it sinful for widows to masturbate?

Is it okay for widows to masturbate?

How do you answer the question of whether or not it’s okay for widows to masturbate?  Well, I got asked this very question back in August and I’ll admit, I’ve been hesitant to answer it.  Here’s the comment from our Are sex toys allowed in

10 steps to better orgasms for wives

10 steps to improving orgasms for wives

Way back in 2014, someone asked in our Wives’ Orgasm Experiences survey how to have better orgasms for women: Beyond how to achieve orgasm, I’d like to hear from other wives on how they have gotten their orgasms stronger or more complete.  I often feel

Your spouse may need time to want sex

Your spouse may need time to desire sex

Something that’s often hard for those of us who are interested in sex more often to understand why our spouses don’t want sex as often.  While working through my questions backlog, I saw this one, and wanted to answer it: What does it mean for

Are some men just not as visual as others?

Here’s a question I received through our Have A Question page a while back (I have a bit of a backlog). Are some men just not as visual as others? My husband doesn’t seem that affected by my physical appearance, and I am a petite

I don’t think my spouse is attracted to me

I received this question through our Have A Question page yesterday: Why do I feel that my wife doesn’t find me attractive or desirable? For the past couple of years, I have been feeling like my wife doesn’t find me attractive anymore. She hardly ever