Category Archives: Sex Drive

How do I open up to my spouse sexually?

How do I open up to my spouse sexually?

Here’s a question that’s very important to me, because it’s one that is beginning of something wonderful in a marriage.  I’ve gotten it so many times over the years that I wrote an entire course around it. How do I open up to

Why lower-drive spouses should initiate sex

One of the largest, and yet least talked about, struggles in marriage is the difference in sex drives.  Often one spouse ends up doing the bulk of the initiating and pushing for a more varied and passionate sex life.  Often, this ends up

Is this what an orgasm feels like to everyone else?

Is this what an orgasm feels like to everyone else?

I’ve been playing with a new chat feature on the website, and it’s been interesting to talk to some of my readers.  Here’s a question I received this week and I asked if I could write a post about it.: Hi! I’ve got

Why doesn’t my wife get wet?

Why doesn't my wife get wet?

I get a lot of husbands asking me the question “Why doesn’t my wife get wet?”  I similarly get questions from wives asking why their husband doesn’t believe them when they say they’re enjoying themselves during sex despite not being lubricated. So, here

Being more skilled at rejection

Being more skilled at rejection

A couple of posts ago, I wrote about being more skilled at initiating sex, but today we’re going to tackle rejection.  I think sexual rejection might be one of the touchiest conflicts to handle in marriage.  It’s hard to do correctly and too

Being more skilled at initiation

I think one of the biggest conflicts regarding sex with a lot of couples is simply how initiation and rejection are handled.  From both sides. I think if we could improve that one back and forth conversation, a lot of marriages would be

Can married sex be erotic?

Can married sex be erotic?

Yesterday I wrote that one of the myths we buy into is that sex has to be erotic all the time.  I think it’s true that sex won’t be erotic every time. Sometimes, like with “maintenance sex” as I called it, sex isn’t

3 myths that kill maintenance sex

3 myths that kill maintenance sex

I fully believe that married sex should be erotic, frequent, adventurous and a host of other things.  However, sometimes there’s just not enough time for all of those things. Life can get busy and occasionally you just have to have sex, because that’s

Are you the gatekeeper of sex?

Are you the gatekeeper of sex?

It often happens that one spouse becomes the gatekeeper of sex in a marriage. I think a lot of the time, they don’t even realize they are.  Sometimes it’s because they’re selfish.  Sometimes it’s because they have misunderstandings about sex.  Sometimes it’s because

Do you have time to explore?

Do you have time to explore?

We’re having a rough time lately with regard to bed times. Our youngest just doesn’t want to sleep when we want to sleep when we want to sleep.  He’ll pass out on the floor at supper time, which is a terrible time for

Do you feel like a sexual being, or a sexual object?

Do you feel like a sexual object or a sexual being?

I’m trying to process something I was thinking about on my commute home today.  It has to do with this verse: The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband