Yesterday I wrote against using fantasy while having sex. In it I promised that I’d write a post on how to be more mindful during sex. Here are thirteen ways that you can be more present during sex. I hope…
13 ways to be more present during sex
Latest posts & podcast episodes
Is it okay to fantasize about your spouse?
Last week I wrote a post about how fantasizing can be detrimental. In the comments, MaBeck asked this question: Ok, so what about if I fantasize about me and my husband, is that ok? For some reason, if I fantasize about us…
Fantasy has a different context than reality
Often people are confused about how their brain works. In this case, how it works in real life situations compared to when they are fantasizing. Using fantasy, whether it be erotic stories, porn, or just a daydream, they can get…
Should you have joint bank accounts as a couple?
My youngest sister recently got married. One of the questions she asked in the first few days was if they should have joint accounts at the bank. Decades ago it wouldn’t even have been a question. It was just…
Do men like having their balls played with?
Sorry if the title’s a bit crude. Couldn’t find anything that fit better. I’ve received a bunch of questions over the years about testicles. Here’s the most recent one: Do most men like having their balls played with? My husband…
Vacation does not necessarily equal sex
It’s Thanksgiving this weekend here in Canada, that means hanging out with the family. Yesterday we had a chance to go up north to cottage country and help my in-laws get ready for maple syrup season. We spent two days…
Your definition of gross changes when you’re aroused
Often people are confused about how their reactions to things change when their aroused vs not aroused. Here’s an example from our anonymous questions page: My wife loves anal stimulation with a finger or two during oral. But when I…
How to stop looking at other women
There seems to be a big struggle, with men in particular, around looking at other women. I don’t just mean porn, but just walking down the street, in the store, or anywhere else. Of course, some women struggle with this…
Are you missing out in your spouse’s bids?
I don’t hear the word “bid” much anymore. I feel like I hear it a lot more when growing up. It seems to have fallen into disuse. Today I’m going to use it, because I don’t know a better word…
How to move past hurt
I often deal with spouses who have trouble forgiving their husband or wife for some hurt they caused. Sometimes it’s big, like an affair. Sometimes it’s not quite as monumental, like being late somewhere. Large or small issue, often spouses…
Your spouse’ sin doesn’t counterbalance yours
Not a week goes by that I don’t see this portrayed in a comment or email from a reader. Their spouse has committed, or is committing, some sin, and so their response is that they have to do something wrong as…