Why Does My Husband Want Sex In The Morning?

Jay Dee

Why Does My Husband Want Sex In The Morning?

Oct 21, 2012

Why is it that men like sex in the morning? It drives a lot of women absolutely crazy because they wake up in the morning feeling groggy, haven’t done their makeup, they have bed-head, etc., etc., basically, not feeling fully confident in themselves as a sexual being.

I’ve seen this question floating around.  Why is it that men like sex in the morning?  It drives a lot of women absolutely crazy because they wake up in the morning feeling groggy, haven’t done their makeup, they have bed-head, etc., etc.,  basically, not feeling fully confident in themselves as a sexual being.

So, why is it that men are ready to go first thing in the morning.

I think there are two reasons.

Hormones

The first is that many men wake with an erection in the morning.  And frankly, nothing puts you in the mood for sex like an erection.  It’s pretty difficult to think about anything else really.  So, that leads to the question, why do many men wake with an erection most mornings (if not all)?

For that, we have to blame testosterone.

Testosterone is a hormone found in both women and men, but it is far more ubiquitous in men.  It is known as the “male hormone” or the “sex drive hormone” or the “caveman hormone” or a bunch of other names.  Testosterone is what makes men more prone to aggression, it fuels our sex drive, it shapes our bodies during puberty (and afterwards), it basically makes us do all the things that are stereotypically male.  Yes, it even makes us able to sit in front of the TV and absolutely tune out the world.

But, for the purpose of this discussion, we’re going to boil it down to higher testosterone levels = higher sex drive.

Now, we get little testosterone bursts from a lot of things:

If men watch a sexually explicit movie (which I don’t suggest), there is a 35% increase in testosterone 60-90 minutes afterwards.

If a man talks to a woman there is a slight increase.

If we smell an ovulating women, there is an increase (I didn’t realize we had such refined noses).

If we work out at a gym, or exert ourselves physically, there is a testosterone increase.

There are a bunch of little things that can increase testosterone production during the day.  However, the bulk of production is done at night, and it is mostly done right before the REM part of a sleep cycle.  In fact, low testosterone levels can often be linked to a lack of sleep.   Males who sleep less than 8 hours a day have markedly decreased testosterone levels, and it keeps decreasing the less sleep you get.

So, this all leads to the fact that by morning, a man has about as much testosterone as he’s going to get during the day.  This can often cause an erection, it causes us to think about sex (as well as the erection being a constant reminder), and it has a tendency to make us more aggressive in pursuing sex.

On to reason #2:

Sex Makes The Day Better

Any day that starts with sex is almost guaranteed to be a good day, regardless of what happens.  Sex decreases stress levels, it increases testosterone production, it produced natural anti-depressants, it’s good exercise, it makes us feel connected to our wife, and about a million other benefits come from sex.  So, it’s no wonder men want sex in the morning, think of all the positive reinforcement we get:

Decreased stress – you just feel more relaxed and able to tackle the day, so you can be more productive

Increased testosterone – this makes us more aggressive and assertive, we feel more confident

Natural anti-depressants – you feel happier and happier people are more productive

Good exercise – just about everyone feels better with exercise, this is a known fact

Oxytocin burst – we feel more connected to our spouse, so we’re more loving, more romantic (or try to be anyways), and in turn this can lead to more sex later

Basically, this is a winning combination, we will have one of the best days of our lives, happier and more productive, and the next day, we want to have that experience again, and our wives are the only ones that can legitimately help us achieve this state.

Men: Do you agree with this? Does it match your experience?

Wives: Does this help clear up some questions about why your husband is attacking you in the morning?

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