Stop telling men to be self-sacrificing

Stop telling men to be self-sacrificing

I’m getting sick and tired of hearing references to Ephesians 5:25.  It seems every time I turn around, some other person, be it a man or a woman, is quoting it.  In case you don’t know it off the top of your head.

What can you do if your wife is too ticklish for oral sex?

What can you do if your wife is too ticklish for oral sex?

You know what I love about being a Christian marriage educator?  Helping people by answering questions they don’t feel they can ask anywhere else.  Giving them a safe place to ask it and doing my best to make them feel like they’re not

Sex, clothing & lights survey

As my long time readers know, we have long standing practice of running surveys.  In fact, we have quite the list going from surveys done over the years: Some “rough” sex statistics Is my spouse attracted to me? Reasons not to have sex

What do people do about cleanup after sex?

What do people do about cleanup after sex?

Sex can often by a bit of a messy activity.  Between bodily fluids and lube, there’s generally a lot of liquids to deal with after you’re done.  And unfortunately, no one really talks about it, so you don’t really know what to expect,

Is it okay to write erotica for my spouse?

Is it okay to write erotica for my spouse?

We hear all the time from Christian bloggers about the dangers of reading erotica.  A quick search found no less than a dozen posts on the topic.  However, I couldn’t find a single one (besides my own) on writing erotica from a Christian

If initiating sex is uncomfortable, start with initiating precursors

If initiating sex is uncomfortable, start with initiating precursors

A lot of spouses are not comfortable initiating sex.  It might be that you have a fear of rejection, or that your upbringing makes you uncomfortable being sexual, or any other reason. In our Becoming more sexually engaged course, we challenge wives to

Do you believe you are lovable?

I think many of us struggle with the belief that we are lovable. We generally think that, as we are, we’re really not worthy of love.  I think this feeling of a sense of worth is often compounded in Christians due an imbalance

Do you control your emotions? Or do they control you?

Do you control your emotions, or do they control you?

Emotions are a good thing.  You know how I know?  Because Jesus wept.  God created us with emotions, and even a sinless Christ without a sinful nature experienced them.  Not only that, but He experienced the full gamut of emotions, from joy to

Are you giving to get?

Are you giving to get?

One of the biggest problems with relationships are covert contracts. Covert contracts are basically an agreement you have in your mind that if you do something, you’ll get something back in return. Typically you fool yourself into believing everyone understands the contract, but

Are you initiating conversations for the wrong reasons?

Are you initiating conversations for the wrong reasons?

Why do you initiate conversations in your marriage?  Chances are they’re for the wrong reasons.  I know mine were for years.  Still are half the time to be honest. I’m not talking about the “Who is going to pick up the kids” conversations.

Talking about sex - survey results

Talking about sex survey results

Probably the number one piece of advice I hand out to people is “talk to your spouse about it”.  It’s amazing how often that simple answer makes huge changes in marriage. But, I wanted to know how much of a difference talking about