Category Archives: Marriage

How to use conflict to create intimacy

Does a disagreement always mean an argument?  Does resolving it always mean compromise or someone changing their opinion?  I’ve had this question come up a few times this week from multiple sources. Many people believe that a difference in opinion must result in an argument,

Have you’ve broken your wedding vows?

In our culture, when we say someone “broke their vows”, we automatically jump to thinking they had an affair or got divorced.  But I think many of us are breaking our vows daily. What did you promise at your wedding?  Now, I don’t know exactly,

How to stop feeling hurt so often

My spouse is in a unique position to hurt me more deeply and more often than anyone else, simply by being in an intimate (not just physically) relationship with me.  She knows how to push my buttons better and harder than anyone else, and I

Should spouses avoid speaking about divorce?

  There are differing views within Christianity regarding divorce.  Some don’t really see a problem with it at all, that if you are unhappy, you should leave.  Others believe the very word should be stricken from our vocabulary.  They believe that divorce shouldn’t only not

February Squat Challenge

February Squat Challenge

From time to time, I like to run month-long challenges. Some of you joined us for our DietBet game, and even more for our Kegel challenge. This month, we’re going to be doing squats. Why do a squat challenge? Well, squats have a lot of

Drop “should” from your vocabulary this year

“Should” is a dangerous word that gets used far too often.  Now, I’m sure there are some appropriate times where it can be used, but often we don’t use it appropriately.  Often we use “should” where it’s actually harmful to what our goals are.  And,

The best way to discuss sexual fantasies

The best way to discuss sexual fantasies

Sharing a sexual fantasy with your spouse can be daunting.  I’ve received many emails from husbands and wives who have opened up to their spouse about something they want and get so completely shut down and rejected that they never want to open up again.

Sometimes you need to stop talking

Sometimes you need to stop talking

I’m always going to be in favor of communication, but there are times when you need to stop talking and just start actually doing something, even in marriage where communication is a vital skill.  Today we’re going to look at some of these things. 1.

Why it’s important to talk about sex

Why it's important to talk about sex

Every once in a while, someone contacts me saying their spouse won’t talk to them about sex.  Sometimes it’s part of a larger issue of not wanting to talk at all, but often every other topic is acceptable, it’s just sex that isn’t.  So, I