Category Archives: Sex

Trapped gatekeepers – blame the guard, not the prisoner

Trapped gatekeepers - blame the guard, not he prisoner

In some marriages, the spouse with the lower sex drive simply decides their perspective is the most important and ends up being the gatekeeper of sex.  That is, they decide when sex is, what sort of sex there is, and generally it’s given

Is it okay to engage in pegging in a marriage?

Is it okay to engage in pegging in a marriage

Those of you who get our weekly newsletters know that I’ve been dragging my feet while writing this for the last week.  Those in our private Facebook group know it’s been even longer – and my wife knows it’s been quite a long

The best way to discuss sexual fantasies

The best way to discuss sexual fantasies

Sharing a sexual fantasy with your spouse can be daunting.  I’ve received many emails from husbands and wives who have opened up to their spouse about something they want and get so completely shut down and rejected that they never want to open

How to be present during sex

Do you find you get distracted during sex? Have trouble staying in the moment? Here are 8 steps with tips to stay focused and in the moment in bed.

Black Friday deals to spice up your marriage!

Well, it’s Thanksgiving in the US … you know, because they’re trying to catch up with us Canadians who had Thanksgiving last month 🙂  Of course, with the American Thanksgiving comes Black Friday and some crazy deals. So, I thought I’d write a

Why is sex better when my spouse is drunk?

Why is sex better when my spouse is drunk?

Here’s a question I know quite a few people struggle with.  I know I have in the past.  To be honest, the idea is still a bit tempting even though we don’t drink anymore. I often like to get my wife drunk so

Why is initiating sex so difficult?

  If you’re married, you likely have some difficulty initiating sex.  Whether you’re a husband or wife, high drive or low drive, we have all have potential obstacles that can hold us back from showing our spouse we want to be physically intimate

The dishes can wait – How to make sex a priority

Do you ever find that you have so much to do in the evening, dishes, laundry, catching up on TV shows, etc., that by the time you get to bed, you’re too tired to have sex?  With 5 kids to clean up after,

Why it's important to talk about sex

Why it’s important to talk about sex

Every once in a while, someone contacts me saying their spouse won’t talk to them about sex.  Sometimes it’s part of a larger issue of not wanting to talk at all, but often every other topic is acceptable, it’s just sex that isn’t. 

A Day of Sex

A day of sex

We tried something recently that I thought I’d share, because it might interest some of you.  Warning: If you’re currently in a marriage where your spouse is actively gate-keeping or refusing sex, don’t read this.  It will just irritate you. I was listening

How do you do kegel exercises?

How do you do kegel exercises?

My regular readers should know by now that we’re doing a 30-day kegel exercise challenge, and today is day 1!  Now, if you want to participate in the group, you should join it on Facebook here. I thought I’d write a quick post