Right after my post on why some women find their legs shake after orgasm, I received this question:
I am a 50 year old women. This year I have started crying after having an orgasm. Nothing is wrong at all it’s like a physical response. My husband is supportive but doesn’t really understand. Is this normal/typical and if so why does this happen?
Let’s tackle the “why does this happen” first.
Why some people cry after sex
There are two main reasons I can find, or rather theories, since there is very little research on either.
The first is that you’re on such an emotional high that your body doesn’t know what to do, and so it cries to relieve the emotional tension. Sex produces a ton of hormones in our bodies, and honestly, science hasn’t really figured out what they all do. I mean, we know some, but we don’t know everything, and certainly not how they all interact with each other. And so, for some people (women more than man, but it happens in men to), sometimes, or all of the time, you might find yourself crying, even while you’re happy. It’s as if your body has just let go of a huge physical tension, and your mind wants to do the same with the emotional tension.
The second reason might be something called post-coital dysphoria, which can be translated for us non-psychology majors as “post sex sadness”. Many people feel a sort of depression kick in after sex. They just feel sad. This is likely again due to either all the hormone interactions, or it’s sort of the sadness after a high. Sex and orgasm is so good, that afterwards, life just seems blah. Now, this doesn’t seem the case for you, but I thought I’d add it incase someone else feels this.
Now, if you’re 50 years old, crying, or feeling like you have to cry after sex, could be related to menopause or pre-menopause because your hormones are all in flux already. I don’t know if it will continue, or stop, or what. As I said, there just isn’t enough research on the subject. However, you can look into something like macca root, which can be used to help rebalance hormones. I would say ask your doctor about it…but they aren’t likely to know about alternative medicine. So, you could visit your local health food store and see if they have knowledgeable staff.
Is it normal and/or typical to cry after sex?
Yeah, this is pretty common. I can’t tell you how many people have this occur, but it happens fairly regularly as far as I can tell. I haven’t been able to nail down any numbers to say what the actual occurrence is I’m afraid. But, don’t worry, you’re okay, it’s not unusual. I asked my wife, and she said that she’s felt like she was going to cry after sex occasionally before. Just tell your husband that your orgasm was so good, your body has to vent a little. It can’t contain all the emotions you’re feeling. Just ask him to hug you while you come down from it and you’ll be fine.
I hope that helps.